Tag Archives: personal development

Episode 172 – 4 Power Skills of Persuasion

Summary:

Talking Too Much 

  Being an extrovert, having the gift of gab, or being able to make small talk with anyone you meet can definitely be used to your advantage, but watch yourself. How can you persuade if you are always talking? It will be very annoying to your audience if they sense that you like hearing yourself talk more than listening to their concerns. Remember, it’s about them, not you. Great persuaders listen more than they talk. In fact, great persuaders use their listening and questioning skills to get their audience to persuade themselves. 

 

Often when someone comes to you, she already knows what she wants. She already has something in mind. She just needs to talk through it with someone. Which approach do you think will have better, longer-term results: you persuading your audience, or you helping them persuade themselves? It’s much better if your audience feels as if they have made the decision themselves, without perceived external influences. When you do have to talk, be succinct and to the point. A good rule of thumb is not to talk more than 30 percent of the time. 

Link to article: http://foodpsychology.cornell.edu/discoveries/curse-chinese-buffet

 

Now, with these general guidelines in place, it is worth pointing out that you must always be prepared to adapt and adjust to the personality type of your audience. For some people, talking 30 percent of the time will still be too much. Discussing only what is relevant to the matter at hand and keeping chit-chat to a minimum is best for these no-nonsense types. Your attempts at being their buddy will likely annoy and maybe even offend them. Some people feel that being overly warm and personable is not appropriate when you have just met someone for the very first time. Polite and professional, yes, but warm and fuzzy, no. The bottom line is, don’t get too friendly too fast

Check out this episode!

Episode 127 – Inner Qualities of Leadership

On episode 127 of Maximize Your Influence, Kurt and Steve start by discussing a recent article, the 7 Mental Blocks to Being Rich.  They then transition to part two of their series on qualities of great leaders.

Intuition is a big part of your future success.  Intuition helps you read and understand people.  It comes in an instant and we have to be ready to act simultaneously.  Some call it a hunch, gut reaction or a feeling.  Intuition is real and can be harnessed to increase your ability to influence and transmit charisma.  Leaders who are able to distinguish between random thoughts and intuition are more successful in life and in business.  Face it, just take a look at CEO’s of large corporations.  They have access to all the logical research they need to make a good, educated decision.  The successful ones will admit that ultimately they have to follow their heart and use personal intuition.  Studies show that the majority of people use intuition, but had a difficult time verbalizing to others why or how it worked.

As humans, (when we listen) we have the ability to read people from a facial expressions, gestures, tone of voice or even a smell.  This comes from our early programming as humans to be able to meet a person and instantly decide if they are a friend or foe.  Those that have the ability to follow their intuition correctly would be able to sense danger or make a new friend.  We know when we have met someone for the first time that we have categorized them in the first 30 seconds.  We have decided if we like or dislike the person and this comes from our intuition.

I am not saying never to do any research. You should spend some time gathering and analyzing information.  The challenge is that you can gather information for the rest of your life.  At one point you will have to make a decision and it should be from your intuition.  At times you will have to make a quick decision and you should let your intuition guide you.  It is a combination of your feelings, your wisdom and your experience.  This will take a little faith and a little practice.  Learn to stretch yourself.  Don’t limit yourself to the facts or the opinions of other people.  You have to learn to follow your heart and tap into your priceless intuition.

Some of us are afraid to talk about intuition because it is so hard to explain.  Let me tell you that successful people use it every day.  They don’t always openly talk about it, but it is being used.  Intuition is more valuable than you realize.  It is used to enhance our creativity, charisma and increases our ability to connect with others.  Sure, super analytical people tend to shoot down intuition as woo-woo or something that is just a myth, but it is a skill you can learn and master.  Just because you don’t understand how it works, does not mean that it does not work.

Intuition expands our ability to tap into our previous experience, our knowledge and our stored memories.  We might not remember what memories or experience we are drawing on, but it was something we already have learned and it is expressed as a gut feeling.  The main obstacle that impedes us from following our intuition is convincing ourselves that it works and should be taken seriously.  What are you listening for?  How does your intuition talk to you?  It can be called impulse, urge or even that inner voice.  Start listening and you will save yourself a lot of time, energy and money.

Our instincts can evaluate our previous experiences, sense the emotions of the moment and rely on past knowledge.  We are always receiving constant information through our intuition.  We just need to listen.  As you practice using your intuition, new and inspiring ideas will intuitively and instinctively arise on their own.  You will be able to solve problems fast.  Learn to focus and concentrate, this type of focus will nurture and augment your newfound inner strength and instinct.  Sure your logical mind will fight you on these new thoughts and ideas, but eventually your new found intuition will win.